Lifestyle Choices

Recently I received a call’ rom Marla, a former client whom I had last seen for sex therapy with her husband, Rhett, two years before. Marla had been sexually abused by her father and had suffered sexual problems in her marriage as a result. On the phone Marla said she was feeling depressed and needed to come back into counseling again. I wondered what was causing her problems. My last contact with her had been several months ago on the phone when she told me things were going well, she and Rhett were having sexual relations about once a week, she enjoyed the experiences and had even felt strong urges that led to her initiating sex with Rhett on several occasions. (more…)

These are the basic rules that really do help to protect you:

1 Don’t roast yourself

However tempting it might be, don’t ever lie in the sun. And always stay near trees for shade or an umbrella (preferably dark and tightly woven). Do remember that indoor “palefaces” who quick-roast themselves in the sun on a two-week vacation can measurably increase their risk of skin cancer.. (more…)

Many parents hold to the foolish idea that money is the important thing in life. As a result they neglect their children and fail to spend sufficient time in their training. This is a serious mistake. Money is always useful, but material wealth alone will never guarantee a happy home. In fact, it might have the opposite effect.

Although a good bank account might be a fine asset to any well-trained young person, it could be a menace to one who has never had adequate training. When such a person inherits a large fortune, he may quickly lose it on useless investments. Or as it sometimes happens, he may try to dominate those around him by giving or withholding money. In the end no one is happy. (more…)

Who Starts the Quarrels?

How do most family quarrels start? This, of course, is hard to say, for usually there is no single cause. Often there is some underlying discontent, particularly on the part of the wife. Marriage has changed her lot completely, while her husband may be carrying on the same work that has occupied his time for years. He may prefer to continue his routine uninterrupted, while she will want plenty of variety. She may then assume that he does not love her. This may be true in some instances, but not in most. In any case she may begin to feel rather neglected. She wants more attention. A brisk family contention may seem a rather rough way to bring this about, but it usually attracts the attention she craves—sometimes much more! Most men will take just so much, then there may be trouble, perhaps even physical violence. The sensible thing to do is prevent such episodes before they reach the place where there seems to be no turning back. (more…)

Rain and snow are the original sources of all our drinking water. Raindrops are formed from the heavy vapor that arises from the sea. As the clouds pass over the land, they condense into drops of rain or flakes of snow. We are all familiar with the fact that a rainstorm clears the air, washing it clean and free from dust and smoke.

Raindrops are usually free from germs, although they may contain a little dust and perhaps a few harmless microbes. Trouble starts when the raindrops strike the surface of the earth. The rain that collects on cultivated fields, farmyards, and city streets may contain many different kinds of germs, some of which are harmful to man. Many of these germs found on the ground have come from the digestive organs of animals and human beings. These are the bacteria that often cause serious intestinal diseases.

But the trouble is not always with water that falls onto the ground. People who use tanks and cisterns must also be careful. Roof water may be almost as badly contaminated with germs that have found their way there by dust blowing up from the street. There is also the problem of germs from the droppings of birds. Tank or cistern water should always be boiled or sterilized. (more…)

Many of us never worry about our health until we are in danger of losing it. Then we are willing to pay any price, pouring out the savings of a lifetime in a vain attempt to try to win it back again. Our health is our greatest possession. Why should we throw it away through ignorance? There is no substitute for good health. We must take care of it while we have it. Our whole future depends upon our maintaining a sound mind in a healthy body.

Hospitals all over the world are filled with people who have disregarded the laws of health. Some may not have realized their danger. Others knew but did not care. They evidently thought that they could dodge the consequences. Perhaps they did for a while. But eventually even the strongest constitution will break if we continue to disregard the laws of health.

Many a chronic invalid might have enjoyed good health all through his life if he had only known how to keep well. Instead of living a happy life, free from sickness, he has become a burden to himself and perhaps to the community as well. Prevention is always far better than cure. Knowing how to live will keep us out of trouble. It will enable us to live out our years in peace and contentment, free from unnecessary pain and illness. (more…)

Living in a large city is not always safe. Wherever large numbers of people are gathered together, there is always some risk of infection. During an epidemic it is easy for disease to spread quickly from one person to another. The more dense the population, the greater the danger.

Out in the country the risk of infection may be somewhat less. The protective forces of nature often help to prevent disease. Many germs are destroyed by the heat of the sun and by the drying effects of the wind. The cold days of winter may also help to eliminate some harmful bacteria. But a few germs may still be there after the snow has melted. This is more apt to be true where the winters are short and relatively mild. (more…)

I took my first unconscious step towards female emancipation and away from martyrdom when I decided that, instead of teaching the au pair girl to cook for the children, it might be a better investment of time to teach the children to cook for the au pair. After all, I don’t change the children every year. For the first time they always ate what was put before them and they eventually asked to do the shopping, a task which they performed far more frugally than I.

The next step was to find a new job for the au pair, and to invest the money saved on wages in anti-drudge machines. One was the fridge-freezer, the other was the dishwasher, and any working woman with a family could regard these as business investments to offset against her wages in the family budget. The cost of both machines was equivalent to the au pair’s wages for eighteen months, not taking her keep into account. Furthermore, I’ll never have to do the freezer’s homework and the dishwasher is hardly likely to have an affair with my husband. (more…)

A tycoon millionairess once told me that she found a business easier to run than a home. I’m sure she’s right. I’ve never yet been able to make the housekeeping show a profit, but my system is to run it in the same way as I run an office, with a planned budget, purchasing and filing department (all me). This is not nearly as clever or complicated as it sounds. Any sane woman in a perfect world wouldn’t bother, but if like me you’ve lost two vacuum cleaners and £140 worth of laundry in one year you’ll know it’s worthwhile.

The equipment: All you need to get organized is a writing surface, a chair, a kitchen drawer, a large cardboard box or a bit of shelf space on which to store two wire office trays or a couple of shopping bags (IN and OUT), eight double-sided envelope files with which to start a filing system, a duplicate book, two notebooks, envelopes and writing paper, a handbag diary and notebook, an address book — and some pretty postcards. (more…)

The Causes

Although allergies and allergic reactions to particular substances are not inherited, a tendency to them can be. If, for instance, both your mother and your father suffered from allergies, you have a 57 percent chance of them too. Approximately 15 percent of all women are said to be highly prone to allergic reactions, 25-30 percent are less easily sensitized (which means they will react adversely only to some substances, sometimes), and 55-60 percent are relatively allergy-free or only rarely prone to allergic reactions. But, on the whole, allergic complaints are on the increase, and cosmetic dermatitis and skin sensitivities are leading the field. For instance, in one study of skin ailments in the mid-seventies it was found that where, four years before, only 3 percent of the patients in Britain seen by dermatologists were suffering from skin reactions, in the space of a very few years it had risen to 14 percent. (more…)

1. Don’t dwell on what went wrong. Learn from it and put it behind you. If, at any stage, you find you are slipping and the programme is not working, go back to the things that did work - sharpen up your focus again and look at the basics; exercise, nutrition and monitoring.
2. Spend plenty of time on your successes. Make something out of them. Find ways to reward yourself for doing it right and getting to your short- term goals. Try to set the goals so that they are at least achievable - there is great power in feeling that you have actually over-achieved.

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PATCH TEST

Before starting your herbal treatments always do a patch test. Dab a little of your preparation on the pulse point of your wrist or in the crook of your elbow. Leave it unwashed for 12 hours to see whether you have an allergic reaction to it. Always be sure of the identification of the herbs you are using and if ever you are in doubt, consult your doctor or skin specialist. Many people are allergic to a wide range of ingredients and I urge you to tread with care and always test your blends and mixtures, lotions and salves before using them.

CLEANSING

There are literally hundreds of creams, lotions, tonics and soaps available on the market, enough to confuse anyone. I like to keep my cosmetics simple and effective and the following is a list of natural facial cleansers, fresh and delightful to use, and available to all at very little cost.

Rainwater

The softest and most beautiful water of all — perfect for washing the face and hair. Make a plan to catch some, in a big clean basin, next time it rains. (more…)

(When sleeping women wake, mountains move. Chinese proverb)

Affirmations are a very effective way to use positive self-talk and to anchor it in your subconscious. They can even be a form of prayer. Affirmations are phrases you repeat to yourself on a daily basis. It is not important that you may not believe them at first. We all have an inner dialogue to contend with, which may not agree with our affirmation. The key is to master this nagging voice. Understand it is a normal part of reaching beyond your comfort zone. When you hear your inner dialogue speaking louder than your affirmation, acknowledge it, but be aware you have a choice. You can listen to it or choose not to. You have the power and ability to control it. It’s that simple. It is a good idea to write your statements on cards and place these around your environment where you will see them every day: on the fridge, bathroom mirror, beside your bed, in your car, in your diary, on your desk at work, etc.

Always formulate your affirmations in the present tense. ‘I have’ or ‘I am‘ is a good way to start. Your subconscious mind is so obedient that if you declare your affirmation in the future tense, such as ‘I want’ or ‘I will have: then it will always stay just out of your reach — in the future. Start to listen to yourself and others carefully. If you find that people say ‘You always say that: take heed. They may be revealing something about yourself you weren’t aware of. (more…)