Lifestyle Choices

A great many of my patients do not really know what stress actually is. They think that it’s an outside force causing them to feel tense. But that’s not stress — that’s a stressor. Stress is a person’s negative reaction to a stressor.

For the most part, people have a negative reaction to stressors when they feel that their stressors are greater than their ability to deal with them. When they feel like this, they see their stressors as threats. On the other hand, if they think they can handle their stressors, they usually see them as challenges and generally enjoy grappling with them.

If you now feel as if your life is full of threats, instead of challenges, you are experiencing stress. If your degree of stress is severe, it’s going to be quite difficult for you to live a balanced, healthy lifestyle free from compulsion, including the compulsion to overeat. (more…)

Stop Killing Yourself, Dad!

Men, let’s stop putting off that all-important medical checkup. Why not make an appointment right now? Better still, let your wife make it for you. She has even more to lose than you have in this. It is time to see your doctor.

Stop driving yourself so hard. You need more rest. Don’t try to whip up those jaded nerves and flagging muscles by using stimulants. These only cover up the problem. They never solve it. Alcohol, especially when taken to excess, is definitely harmful. The man who is wise will leave it alone.

For the same reason it is better not to smoke, particularly if you are looking forward to enjoying a long life free from disease. It is no secret that cancer of the lung is becoming more common every day. Men seem to be particularly susceptible to this disease. Those who get it are almost always heavy smokers. Primary cancer of the lung hardly exists among those who do not smoke. (more…)

Elderly people have trouble sleeping for the same reasons as people from other age groups. But there are additional factors.

• Chronic illnesses. The elderly often suffer from chronic mental and physical illnesses that make it difficult to fall asleep or stay asleep. For example: An enlarged prostate is often associated with a frequent need to urinate. Dementia may be associated with confusion and heightened fear after dark (known as sundowning). Painful conditions such as bone fractures due to osteoporosis (especially in women), arthritis and vascular disease can make sleeping difficult. Depression, quite common in the elderly population, often causes insomnia as well.
• Medication. Older people have stronger reactions to medication. Notable effects that these medications such as tranquillizers and hypnotics, have on the elderly include frequent nightmares, insomnia and hypersomnia.

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There are some fascinating differences in the sleep habits of men and women.

• Women sleep four minutes less than men on workdays and fourteen minutes less on days off.’ Women sleep forty to fifty minutes less than men if they cater to the needs of a baby or toddler.
• Scientists have discovered that there are differences in the circadian rhythms of males and females. The fraction of sleep is larger in women. The temperature rhythms are identical in males and females; the sleep-wake rhythms are significantly shorter in females.” “Women have shorter periods of deep (non-REM) sleep than men, making them more vulnerable to ‘tossing and turning’ bed partners and fitful babies.”

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When we battle with the night, our sleep is non-refreshing and non-restorative. The daytime consequences range from drowsiness to decreased productivity, increased accident rates, health problems and a reduction in the quality of life. In fact, fatigue is the most common complaint heard by doctors.

Many sleep disorders go unreported because the troubled person is not awake or alert when the symptoms appear. These individuals are chronically exhausted but do not know why, and may be regarded by others as simply lazy. (more…)

If you have trouble falling asleep, or if you wake up a number of times at night, or if you wake up earlier than you would like, or if you always feel as though you need a nap during the day, or if you fall asleep while watching TV or while waiting for a traffic light to change, you might very well have insomnia. If so, you’re not alone. Fifty per cent of the population have experienced insomnia, the most common sleep disorder.’

Those with insomnia experience an insufficient amount of sleep, or do not feel rested after having slept. This often impairs social and occupational functioning, and can be accompanied by feelings of restlessness, irritability, anxiety, daytime fatigue and tiredness.’ Transient or short-term insomnia lasts no more than a few nights to two or three weeks. It can be caused by any of the following: (more…)

Do you find it difficult to fall asleep until well after midnight, yet are able to sleep a normal length of time if you don’t have to get up for work? Or, do you fall asleep too early in the evening and wake up too early in the morning? If so, your biological clock may be out of sync with your preferred sleep-wake schedule.

Someone with delayed sleep phase syndrome has sleep-onset and wake times that are later than desired, but little or no difficulty maintaining sleep once it has begun. Many adolescents, because of their neurophysiology as well as school and social schedules, suffer from this syndrome. (more…)

I’ve read a lot about women who serenely cope with the three roles of full-time working woman, wife, and mother. However, I’ve never actually met one. All the ones that I know feel inadequate.

Going back to work after having children is a practical and emotional problem and both are interdependent. You risk worrying about them when you’re at work and about work when you’re at home, and end up being happy in neither situation.

Two requisites for a working mother are stamina and an understanding family Sympathetic they may be until it comes to your interests versus theirs, but they still want their evening meal on time and they don’t want to hear about the bus queue which made you late. (more…)

The best way to treat indecent exposure is to ignore it and walk on. Try to move away from the man who is pressing against you in a train, bus or lift.

The way to deal with peeping Toms is to cover yourself up and inform the police. If you haven’t any curtains to draw, pin a sheet over the window until you can make curtains.

Stealing knickers is a well recognized minor fetish, so the police advise you never to leave any underwear on the washing line. It’s asking for trouble, they say.

If you feel a groping hand in a darkened cinema or other closed space you could say loudly and clearly `KINDLY TAKE YOUR HAND OFF MY KNEE,’ whereupon he will skid off. Alternatively, change seats at once, keeping an eye on the man. ` If he thinks you’ve merely moved and aren’t going to report him he’ll probably stay in the cinema,’ says Miss Kelly. ‘ Then slip off and ask the usherette for the manager, go back and point him out? (more…)

By ’single’, I mean a woman who is unmarried, divorced, separated, or whose husband is temporarily absent.

Sexual aggression from a stranger may take the form of:

1. Obscene telephone calls.
2. Frottism (such as being rubbed up against in a crowded train or bus).
3. Indecent exposure (such as showing genitals to little girls in a park).
4. Letter threats to rape, maim, or kill.
5. Odd burglaries involving violation (such as urinating on the bed) or the theft of fetish objects such as frilly knickers or black suspender belts.
6. Peeping Toms.
7. Unintentional rape (sometimes called ‘going too far’).
8. Attempted rape.
9.  Rape.
10. Child molestation.

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There are two sorts of crisis: there is the personal one, such as the loss of a job or of a loved one by death or divorce, or the communal one, such as a motorway threat to a village, or a war. But there always seems to be some sort of crisis.

When personal disaster strikes, you probably need sympathy and practical help; but there is a distinct possibility (especially if everyone else is also swimming for the lifeboats) that the only person who is always interested in you, and able to provide you with sustained help is … YOURSELF.

Don’t think ’somebody ought to do something about it’ or `the government should see to it’. Start thinking in terms of self-reliance. What you can do and what you can’t do — that may be all you can count on. Whatever your crisis, force yourself to look cheerful. Shakespeare said: ‘ There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so’, and Napoleon added that `the moral is to material as three to one’. I would also say that the quickest face lift is a smile. Go on — try it, just for today SMILE and try to find something good instead of something bad in every new situation. (more…)

You’ve no doubt heard plenty about smoking and your health, that your lungs and heart could be seriously damaged by the prolonged use of cigarettes. But one of the funny things about being young is that you don’t believe any of those terrible things could happen to you. Heart disease, lung cancers are for somebody else, somebody who is, well, old, but not for you. You’re different. You’re young and pretty and healthy … aren’t you?

Well, even if you don’t believe the doctors’ warnings about smoking and health, you may be convinced by some cold, hard facts about smoking and your looks. Cigarettes damage the outside as well as the inside of your body, and some of the effects aren’t too attractive. For instance, the negative effect of smoking on the circulation can show up in puffy bags under the eyes. Nicotine leaves permanent stains on the teeth, making them a dingy yellow or brown. If you hang on to the habit long enough, you may develop stains on your fingertips. Cigarettes leave a stale, acrid smell in your hair, on your clothes, and on your breath. Finally, you may even develop a nasty chronic cough, and the quality of your voice could become raspy and harsh.

Now that you’ve thought about some of the effects on your appearance, maybe you’ll want to think again before lighting up. Smoking and being beautiful just don’t mix and wouldn’t you really rather be beautiful?

4. Discover Your Own Guidelines

Find out how many different principles and ways of managing stress you can successfully incorporate into your life. Then do it. Stress in a relationship can be a way of improving not only the quality of the relationship but also the value that one places on it. This demands facing discontent clearly and squarely and expressing it in a way that doesn’t try to make someone else responsible for it. For instance, there are two ways of complaining when your mate squeezes the toothpaste in the middle. One is, “My God, you did it again. What’s wrong with you?” and the other, “You know, I have a problem. I am really bothered by people squeezing the toothpaste in the middle. I can’t seem to get over it. I’d be grateful if you didn’t do it. It would help me a lot.” (more…)

Long-term stress can destroy your good looks, your vitality, and eventually your health. But contrary to popular belief, that doesn’t mean there is anything intrinsically dangerous in stress. On the contrary, stress is the spice of life—the challenge just waiting to be met, the excitement of something new and unknown, the wonderful, exhilarating feeling when adrenalin flows through your body and makes you feel ready for anything. It only means that if you do not know how to move from the active, stressed state of mind and body into the passive state of psychophysical relaxation at will, then you, like most people (for few have this skill naturally), are likely to find yourself stuck in the stressed state for long periods. And if it happens often enough and lasts long enough, you can become physically or mentally ill. (more…)

So in personal terms, for the sake of mental and physical health and beauty it is important that every woman develop an awareness of her own personal relationship to stress and come to terms with it. This is all part of what is known as “stress management.” There are many different methods of going about it. If you are familiar with them you can choose which ones work best for you and you will be able to live with your own stress, an inevitable part of every human life, and enjoy it instead of allowing it to turn to distress and make you miserable, ill, and old before your time. (more…)

Every woman has two kinds of energy, male and female. Male energy is like the sun—invigorating, stimulating, creative, and powerful. The male postures in yoga call forth this dynamic energy and release it.

Female energy is recuperative, calming, nurturing, and gentle. The female postures are restoring to body, mind, and spirit. Yoga attempts to release male and female energies and ultimately to fuse them in union—to integrate the person.

The first four postures are male. They are done standing and they revitalize you. The last four are female and calming. In order to achieve the best balance and effect, it is best to do them in the order in which Geoffrey recommends them. (more…)

1. When you breathe, breathe with your whole chest and abdomen too. Most of us breathe only with the top part of our body, which means we are not fully lowering the diaphragm and expanding the lungs and so are not making use of their full capacity. This kind of restricted breathing stifles emotional expression and is often linked with anxiety, depression, and worry. To check for abdominal breathing, put your hands on your tummy. Does it swell when you breathe in and sink when you breathe out? It should. Lying flat on a firm surface, practice breathing fully and gently until you get the feel of it.

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The amount of sleep you need varies tremendously from one woman to another. It also varies from one day to the next. There is no truth in the idea that you need eight hours of sleep to stay well and feel energetic. You might need ten hours, while another woman gets on very well with four and a half. One study showed that short sleepers tend to be active, outgoing people who are sociable, flexible in their personalities, and more conformist socially. Those wanting longer periods of sleep are more introverted and creative and are particularly good at sustained work. Often the more stress-filled your day, the more sleep you will need to recover from it. (more…)

1. Get more exercise regularly during the day. This helps burn up stress- caused adrenalin buildup in the brain, which can result in that tense, nervous feeling where you’re “up” and you can’t seem to get “down.” But don’t take strenuous exercise before going to bed, as it can set the heart pounding and stimulate the whole body too much.
2. Don’t go to bed when you are not sleepy. Instead, pursue some pleasant activity, preferably passive. Television is not the best choice, for rays emitted from the set disturb your nervous system when you least need it.

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The enormous fuss that is made about cellulite always surprises me. “Does it or doesn’t it exist?” “What are its causes?” “What, if anything, can be done about it?” Such is the way women tend to treat cellulite, as if it were some kind of externally imposed curse to which they fall innocent victim.

Cellulite is the manifestation of the wrong kind of lifestyle for health and beauty: eating wrongly (or too much), living under prolonged stress, being exposed to too many pollutants, and all the other things that we tend to think we can get away with, but never really do. And no number of expensive or painful treatments is going to help the problem for long unless you change the things that brought it on in the first place. (more…)